When It's Time
by Broadway4eva
Summary: A angsty/romantic rant from Carter, based off of songs from the American Idiot Broadway Album. Zarter and rated K-plus because I think that the topic of love kind of goes there, since there's no language or violence.


Well, I've been updating a lot today, and this idea kind of popped into my mind. You see, I'm a bit obsessed with the musical American Idiot. Yes, indeed, it is a musical too, written by Mike Mayer, and advised by Billie Joe Armstrong. While listening to the second CD of the album yesterday, I realized that about five of the songs were perfect Zarter material. So, sitting down with a new notebook, I wrote a mini song-fic for each one. They go together in a little angsty/romantic rant of Carter's thoughts. Anyways, enjoy the fic! I don't own Green Day or TKC. Sadly. If only I did own American Idiot. That would be so wonderful!

Around me, in the past year, my world has changed. No longer is anything normal, and I seem to be dreaming of a world similar to my old. Many have died, or been injured. I seem to be dreaming of a world of everything possible. For my family back, this war to be over, and for Zia.

She is truly an extrordinary girl. What may have begun as lust for the beautiful girl was now, no matter what, love. The world seemed plain compared to her. I know that she doesn't see me as anything, and says I need to be more corageous, but I love her. Often, I see her crying, and wonder if she ever gets sick of it. Ever wants someone to comfort her. Like maybe, just maybe, me. Zia is truly extrodinary.

But sadly, I can only dream of her, because she'll never see me "that way." While around me, I've seen my disappear, Bes sacrifice his soul, and Walt nearly die of his curse. I can only hope Zia won't be next.

All I know is that I have to tell her how I feel before anything happens. The words seem to get trapped on my tongue and in my brain. I need Zia. When it's time, I'll tell her I love her, because I want her to know. There's so much doubt in our world, but I have no doubt my love is Zia. Nobody could ever compare to her, nobody I would ever rather say to, "I love you."

We all know we're fighting for our world, but is that alone worth losing life? If Zia were to die, all I know is that I'd be in pieces. Fighting for love as well seems to me, a cause for war. This is the end of the road and we all are wondering, "How much longer?" We don't know when Aphophis will strike, but I know how powerful Zia is, and I'm terrified that she will be lost. I could try, but I never could truly live without her. Was fighting pointless at this point?

If I were to lost her, it would be the September Mom died again. Even now, September is still my least favorite time of year. You can't just wake up and have everything back to normal, so I can't mess this up. This war, or telling Zia I love her. Two extremely hard things. I almost want to reset back to last Christmas; feel the long-ago fallen rain again, and not have to deal with any of this. How could I possibly last without her, if she were to be in the Land Of The Dead, not knowing how I feel?

At first, when I met her shabti, I thought she might feel the same way. But when she died and we found her, it seemed she was a new Zia. I still love her, but it was like meeting a new person. It couldn't be easier to forget her, could it? No, because now I have memories of the new and old Zia Rashid, and I love her. The real Zia. If only she could remember me, the Carter Kane who didn't have to teach Magicians or fight a hopeless war between Ma'At and Chaos. I truly love her. If only she loved me.

This was really fun and sad to write. I'm sorry if I have any grammar or spelling errors, but some things I wasn't sure on. Anyways, R&R, with anything accepted. However, if you are going to flame, I would rather you PM me and say what you want to, as opposed to reviewing. Thanks! And if you are the first person to name all the songs I used in order I used, and say which characters sing them, I'll write a song-fic for a pairing (besides Salt. I'm biased) and song that you want! Well, hasta luego, mis amigos!

-Broadway4eva


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